If I had to pick the most underrated pillar of a long, healthy life, it would be this one.
In that large analysis, the protective effect of strong relationships was comparable to quitting smoking, and larger than the effect of exercising regularly, treating high blood pressure or maintaining a healthy weight.
Why connection matters
Strong social connection is linked to lower inflammation and stress markers, and better sleep. It gives us a shared sense of purpose, and it makes healthy habits easier to keep, because we tend to take on the habits of the people around us.
What matters most isn't how many friends you have. It's the consistency and depth of your connections. A standing dinner, a regular tennis game, a book club or even an active group text all count.
Try this week
- Call one person. Skip the text and connect by voice. The drive or walk home is a great time.
- Join one recurring group activity, such as a class, a team or an interest group, and commit to it for eight weeks.
- Eat with others. Family or friends, aim for three or more shared meals a week.
Bringing it all together
All six pillars are connected. Sleep affects how you eat, stress affects sleep, connection affects stress, and movement affects all of them. Improve one, and the others often follow.
You don't need to do everything. Focus on the one or two things that matter most to you right now. If you haven't yet, try the short Longevity 101 check-in to find your starting point, then pick one small change and give it two weeks.
References
- Holt-Lunstad J, Smith TB, Layton JB. Social relationships and mortality risk: a meta-analytic review. PLoS Medicine. 2010.
- Holt-Lunstad J, et al. Loneliness and social isolation as risk factors for mortality: a meta-analytic review. Perspectives on Psychological Science. 2015.
- Yang YC, et al. Social relationships and physiological determinants of longevity across the human life span. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences. 2016.
- Office of the U.S. Surgeon General. Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation: The U.S. Surgeon General's Advisory on the Healing Effects of Social Connection and Community. 2023.
This article is for general education and isn't a substitute for personal medical advice. Please talk with your own clinician before changing your medications, supplements, diet or exercise routine.
